If you are reading this article, you probably have already come to the realization that your parents are in need of home care.
Most likely, your parents want to remain in their own home and retain as much independence as possible. Helping your parents overcome their perception that accepting in-home care means a loss of that independence is a huge key to getting them on board.
The best way to do this is to help your parents understand the advantages of home care and how it can allow them to stay in their home. Often, your parents will be more open to exploring the possibility of in-home care when faced with the alternative of going into an assisted living or skilled care facility. In-home care allows your parents to receive one-on-one care in the comfort of their own home and will often save money at the same time. With help at home, your parents can remain in control and set their own standards.
If you are met with resistance, try a different approach. Suggest that accepting in-home care would help you and give you peace of mind. Parents are often willing to do something to benefit their children which they would not be willing to do for themselves. Home care might be better accepted if it is viewed as a luxury or benefit—something they deserve—rather than something being forced upon them because they can no longer care for themselves: “Mom, you deserve to have someone come in and prepare some good meals for you,” is more likely to be met with a positive response than “You can’t take care of yourself anymore.”
If your aging parent is concerned about a stranger providing intimate care, a good idea is to start with non-personal care such as light housekeeping, meal preparation and transportation. Your mother or father will get used to the idea of having a caregiver and will be more responsive when the time comes for assistance with personal care.
Although having this conversation with your parents may seem like one of the hardest things you’ve ever had to do, don’t let your parents sense that. Plan your approach and timing carefully and you may be pleasantly surprised. Chances are if the subject is on your mind, it has been on your parents’ minds as well.